i was talking to a guy and he said “if there were no laws you could be raped at any point of the day” and i replied with “yeah and i could retaliate by stabbing the rapist, hey i mean there are no laws” and he said “rape isn’t that bad, stabbing someone is a little over dramatic” wtf.
PAINT YOUR NAILS WITH HIS BLOOD.
life hack: get a tattoo. if the people at the job interview notice it and look concerned, laugh a little and explain “it’s just temporary.” months later if your boss asks why you lied and said it was a temporary tattoo, stare off into the distance and whisper with a tremulous voice the poor excuse for truth your subconscious has been fighting for its entire insignificant existence: “everything is temporary.”
So we have an Italian exchange student at our school. And he and I were hanging out and he saw a pony, and he tried to show me but he didn’t know what it was called so he just pointed at it and said “Look, the compressed horse.”
And then he just grinned at his complete understanding of the English language.
895. Muggleborns wonder why there’s a large group of friendly, teenage ghosts around Hogwarts. They’re led by a funny boy with red hair and one ear who likes to joke around with Peeves, and he always says that they’re Dumbledore’s Last Army.
nearly 9000 notes and nobody has pointed out that suddenly fred has lost an ear as well as george